Wednesday, February 12, 2014

Let it Go

Life is a series of gambles. Every minute that we spend and every small step that we take affects our life in a great deal. That is why whenever we are faced in difficult situations we tend to choose decisions that we know are safe. We shy away from risks and let our fears and inhibitions rule us out. We try our best to not stray on our so called comfort zone. But at the end of the day we have to ask ourselves, are these decisions really worth it? Is this where you want your life to lead to? We only have one chance to live. Is it really worth it to deprive yourself of what your heart truly desires?

Conceal. Don’t Feel. Put on a Show. These are the words that Elsa from the popular Disney animated film “Frozen” had always uttered to hide her powers which she thought would bring harm to her sister Anna and her kingdom Arendelle. But once she realized that with love and right decision, she would be able to control her powers, she was able to turn her curse into a gift. The concept of this is just the same in real life. If we only try to step out of our comfort zone and try to take things in stride no matter how big of a risk it maybe then we’ll have less regrets in life.

But it’s always easier said than done. There are always things that make us think twice about in making the grand decision or simply put it things that weigh us down.  These are the factors that limit us on doing the best that we got. So in order to achieve a more productive life, here are six things that we should try to let go.

1. Seeking for Approval

Other’s opinions don’t always matter. It is good to get advice from parents, friends and mentors, but in the end it’s still your decision that has to prevail. Who cares if other thinks it’s reckless? Who cares if they think you’ll be doing the worst decision of your life? Think of how liberating it would feel if you do not let anyone’s opinion dictate your life.




2.Money

Life does not revolve on money alone.  We should not always consider decisions where we think will fill our pockets. As American Life Coach and motivator Tony Robbins has once said “Don't fall into the trap of prioritizing a busy life over a truly fulfilled one! Make the choices that have deeper meaning and life is sweet.”

3. Jealousy and Insecurity


Admit it or not we always try to compare ourselves to others. From the way we dress to the way our figure should have been the same as that chic who struts on the street like she’s queen. What we don’t realize is that our envy towards others and our complex towards them hinders us from seeing what we have ourselves. Its because of this jealousy and insecurity that we try to copy what he or she is doing, because you know and see is good for her and that keeps you safe. But every person is unique, what might work for her is possibly not the same for you. It’s also better to evaluate what we have ourselves and take pride on the things that we have. Confidence is always the first step into creating the best version of ourselves.



4. Excuses

“I don't have enough time.” “I’m afraid of the competition.”“ It's not the right moment to do it.” “I’ve got to pay the bills.” “I have to plan it out properly first.” “I’m afraid of failure.” These are just some of the most common excuses ( as listed by www.openforum.com ) that every person gives to not let any of his ideas happen. These are the things we tell ourselves to feel better about not taking any risks. But in order for something to work you should leave these excuses behind and start working things out.


5. Regrets

As my favorite line says, there’s no point crying over spilt milk. What has been done is done. We should not always dwell on our mistakes. We should not always think of our what-if’s but instead move forward. Take risks and make chances. Everything might not turn out to be the same you want it to be, but hey, it’s better doing it first then regret the outcome later than forever ponder of what might happen if we do it and what the result of it would be.

Tuesday, February 11, 2014

5 sweet things to do this Valentine’s day

Clip from the 2004 film '50 First Dates'
Valentine’s is fast approaching and for sure some guys (and even girls) out there are already planning on how to make the day special for their loved one or even the person they like or pursuing. I listed down some suggestions/guidelines to help you plot your Valentine’s date. Well, first off, I know we all have our idea of ‘sweet and nakakakilig’ moment, but for a girl’s point of view, I think these things should be taken in consideration.

  1. Bring her to the place you think she would appreciate. If your partner is someone who loves art, then bring her to an art exhibit. If she loves music, you can bring her to a music festival. If she just wants to eat then eat with her. Nothing is sweeter for ladies than knowing that the person who loves/likes them wants to experience or know the activities you are into. This just shows that you are putting more effort to know your partner better
  2. Clip from the movie 'The Notebook'
    Let her face her fears and help her conquer it. Haha. I know this sounds insane but I believe this feels sweet too. Okay, sweet in the sense that you make her feel that you are there to protect her from what scares her (now that sounds knight in shining armor). To give you an idea, if your date has fear of heights, you can invite her to ride a zipline with you. Just make sure you too, can overcome her fears.
    Clip from the movie 'Divergent'
  3. Do the thing that you are both frustrated of. This could be playing a sport, attending a dance class, ice skating or cooking a certain recipe. This could be exciting, especially, when you both have each other to keep going on.
    Clip from the movie 'Silver Linings Playbook'

  4. Travel. Travelling with your special someone is sweet because it gives you a chance to know your partner more by discovering different things together, testing your partnership and most of all, building your trust with each other. Bring her to the places you’ve been and thought would be sweet to go with her.
    Clip from Iya and Drew Arellano Pre-Nuptial
  5. Take time to know/meet her family or friends. Loving someone also means that you also have to love the people they love no matter how unlovable they are. Whether you like it or not, the people whom your partner had grown up with or has joined with are part of her life so you have to accept them as well. Set a time with them. Doing this will not only let you get to know the people she cares but will also give you glimpses of who your partner is really is. As what they say, if you want to know a person deeper, as their friends or family.
    Clip from the 2010 movie 'Submarine'
Take note, these are just suggestions. The success of your date still depends on your creativity, planning skills and readiness. Whatever the outcome may be, just always remember that a day with your love is still the best day ever.



Thoughts you should not have (Helping you out of suicide)

This topic is supposedly for my first vlog, but since I still don't have the time to make it (and you know, I'm not that confident enough), I wrote it for this blog instead. I will definitely make a follow up vlog on this soon (I guess), and I’m hoping you will also check that out.

First, why suicide? I mean, of all the subjects in the world, you might be asking why I chose this one. Well, I think it's controversial, very sensitive, and interesting. Interesting because I myself have experienced it.

Checking some details about suicide, I found out that almost one million people commit suicide every year, with global mortality rate of 16 people per 100,000. It means that one people commit suicide and die every 40 seconds [4]. It's alarming, isn't it?

But, we can avoid this! (Based on my experience) Just lend a hand to someone we know that have this kind of tendency or, if you know that you have it, I hope you will read this article until the end.

I know we can't stop ourselves from being depressed. It is natural for us to feel down when things didn’t go the way we want it to be, when we experience rejections or when we fail. It is okay to feel bad but the question is, how would/should you respond? Will you just drop dead, locked up yourself in your room and let those thoughts consume you, then commit suicide? It is not the end of the world!

There's a lot of things we can discover in social media. If you feel depressed, try to look for bright pictures and explore the hidden treasures of the earth.



Will you let "depression" laughed on your remains? I hope not! Allow yourself to experience the other and bright side of the world.

As I checked online, I found that guys are more prone to suicide [1]. I think this is because most men have higher ego than women. Girls have their own way to vent out, either with their friends, diaries or relatives, unlike guys, who often find it difficult to express themselves. Men usually hide their sorrows until their helplessness consumes them. Guys! There's nothing wrong about crying. It won't make you less of a man to sit down and express yourself without drinking alcohol or taking drugs. Yeah, it will give you comfort during tough times but that comfort is just temporary. The problem is still there, you will just make yourself more terrible after.



"Because they see their friends doing it." [2]

An article from pulitzercenter.org [2] reported that Greenland has the highest suicide rate, and noted to be the "Suicide capital of the world". The country actually have estimated rate of 100 person per 100,000 who commit suicide per year, twice Japan’s suicide rate; the Asian country has been documented to have suicide phenomenon during crisis.

What is alarming is the fact that teens and young adults comprised most of the suicide victims. The reason is still unknown but the article suggests that one reason could be because they have been influenced by their peers or environment. Because they saw their friends doing it.

Do you find it cool cutting your wrist? There is more to life than to bleed, than to be hanged, than to take excessive drugs, than letting your brain burst out.



Another cause of suicide could be being addicted to social media. Why? Because some people are using the social media sites like Facebook, Twitter, etc., to hurt other people. Since conversations are only on the Internet and not personal, people don’t mind if they have offended others with what they do. This is popular as Cyberbullying. According to an article from timesofindia.indiatimes.com [4], many people can't handle online rejection. Too much freedom of speech can cause people to say and do harmful things, to the point of judging other people they don’t even know.



Even if you know the person his/her whole life, you can’t condemn them, because only God can judge people, unless you don’t believe in God. An advertisement reminds us to think before we post something [5]. I'm not saying that we should always play safe but we have to use our right to speak freely or voice out freely in moderation. If you want to post something that you think will end territory conflicts, can end world hunger, can end the government crisis or will bring social change perhaps, why not? Opinions can be powerful if it is constructive. Don't be like some people who just want to prove their dominance, thus, fighting with anyone online.


Quoting Helen Keller, “Keep your face to the sunshine and you can never see the shadow.” It means that as long as we keep on looking into the bright side, our attention to those problems will lessen [6]. We have to focus on the right direction.

I personally follow @earthpics on Twitter and every time I see their posts I found myself relaxed. There's more to life than the sadness we feel. I'm not saying to just ignore these emotions, but if we look on the brighter side of things, it will ease the pain we feel today. Trust me!



In closing, never let things set the end of your life. We just have to have a higher motivation, a higher calling. Don't let "depression" laughed at you because they messed you up. Prove that you are still worthy to live life to the fullest. Appreciate life.
Don't follow trends that will cause you harm and end up killing yourself. Cry out loud and express your emotions, it won’t make us less of a person but will actually make us stronger.

And fight for yourself, because someone had already fought it for you.


Sources:
1. Www.who.int - "Suicide rates per 100,000 by country, year and sex (table)" as of 2011
2. Pulitzercenter.org - "Why do so many greenlander's kill themselves." 2009
3. Rightdiagnosis.com - "Common causes of suicidal tendencies"
4. Timesofindia.indiatimes.com - "Social Media emerging as contributor to suicides: Psychiarist" 2013
5. GMA’s “Think before you Click” campaign
6.brightdrops.com/best-inspirational-quotes